No Man's Land.

Posted: Wednesday, September 17, 2014 by Unknown in Labels: , , , , , ,
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Tennis is a great game. It teaches players a lot about temperament and psychological tendencies. Tennis is one of those games where you must play the ball, not the opponent. If you take care of the ball, take care of your shot, you force your opponent to take care of his business also. 

Court position is a vital part of a player's strategy and ability to execute effective shots. In tennis, the phrase "No Man's Land or The Dead Zone" refers to the area of the tennis court where a player doesn't want to be trading shots. This area is where half volleys land at your feet, shots go into your body and too much open court is exposed for angled passing shots. Good players spend almost no time here. They may return a short ball from no man’s land but will return to the baseline or take the net. No man’s land is where mediocre players go to die.

No man’s land is not just a tennis issue. "No Man's Land" can be a metaphor for nearly every aspect of a life. No man’s land is any place where you are unfocused, uncommitted, waffling, or have an unclear vision of what to do or where you are going... And guaranteed, you will get chewed up. No man’s land is where mediocre entrepreneurs go to die.

If you are going to be successful at anything, at some point you must decide whether you’re in or you’re out. It’s that simple! No more stories, no more sidestepping, no more excuses, escape hatches, or half efforts. You’re either in, or you’re out. You are either going to do it or you're not!

Learn from others that are successful, make your venture a priority, pay the price and never give up!

LWS

#success

We all get down... you just don't want to stay there!

Posted: Saturday, September 13, 2014 by Unknown in Labels: , , , , ,
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Last week I put up a post on Facebook about bitterness and received a private message from a friend who asked a powerful question. She asked; “I liked your post today regarding you and Tracey... But what if it's underlying sadness that often comes out as bitterness. If we let go of the front that holds strong people stronger then we are often left with a crumbling wall of tears. Finding strength to pull past that, has proven difficult for me. Even trusting and relying on God makes me feel weak.”
(While this is a little long, I would like to share my reply here in hopes that it may add value to others going through the same struggles)



Let me start by saying that most people deal with negative emotions by putting up walls. We are all really two people. Who we really are and who we want the world to think we are. The closer the two people are, the greater the happiness and joy in your life. I certainly don’t claim to have all the answers for this one, but I would like to share a couple of thoughts that have been a benefit in my life as well as others.

1. List everything in your life you are grateful for.
No matter the cards you've been dealt, or whether this year has felt tougher than most, there's always something in life to be thankful for. There's also a good reason to find that something: Practicing gratitude and writing down your blessings takes your mind away from what’s wrong with your life and brings you back to what’s right in it. Then begin and end each day reading your list.

2. Make a mental decision that your best days are ahead of you.
Personally, sadness has always seeped into my life when I look at past failures, broken relationships, and regrets. It’s like at times I can get stuck re-reading the same chapter of my life over and over. At some point, I (you) must make a conscious decision to turn the page and move forward with your life. Life is always best when it’s spent looking through the windshield rather than the rear view mirror.

3. Be careful who you confide in.
Working through depression or sadness is an internal battle. While you may have a parent or spouse that can help you through it, more often than not, you create a bigger issue when you get others involved. Unfortunately, there are also people around you that will use it against you and are glad that you have them. When I have spoken with a friend about a problem that they really can’t “fix,” suddenly I have two problems… The original problem, and the reaction from my friend about my problem.

4. Replace your negative thoughts with positive ones.
While it is a difficult skill to master, one of the greatest powers that we have is the ability to choose one thought over another. A trained mind has the ability to decipher what thoughts serve them well and those that don't. While telling someone to “stop thinking about what makes them sad” may sound too simple, training yourself to choose which thoughts to dwell on is one of the best ways to find peace and happiness in your life. Like growing a garden, the only way to have a successful harvest is by regular weeding.

5. Trust in God.
As a Christian, the knowledge that I am not alone is what gives me strength. I admit that I don’t know all of Gods plans in my life… But I know that He has them and I am grateful to be part of them.

Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV) Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

May God Bless you!
You've got this!

Money Is not important to me!

Posted: by Unknown in Labels: , , ,
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Every month or two, usually after one of my business ownership seminars, someone will come up to me and smugly say something like; "I am not like you or these people here, money means very little to me." I always get a good chuckle out of that remark and upon further questioning, without fail, they will fall into one of three categories:

1. They are collecting disability, welfare, unemployment or being financially supported by some other social program.
2. They are living at home with their parents, living on their own with the support of their parents, or are being financially supported by a friend, family member or their spouse.
3 They are working two to three jobs and if married, the spouse works as well. Unfortunately, it has been my experience that the people in the first two categories are virtually unteachable since it requires little or no effort on their part to exist. (Now I realize from time to time someone may need some temporary help, that's not what I am discussing here. I am referring to someone who is "riding in the wagon" questioning the motives as well as minimizing others for wanting to make money while they "pull the wagon.")
 The people in the third category give me hope. They are working hard so I will always try give them a few minutes of my time so I can walk them through a few common misconceptions. Personally, In my early 20's I had some misguided thoughts about money and wealth until I was taught some of the following simple truths:

 1. Money is neither good nor bad, it's a magnifier of who you are. Contrary to what many believe, money is certainly NOT the root of all evil. What the Bible actually says is, “The love of money is the root of all evil” (1 Timothy 6:10). Those two little words, “love of” make a huge difference to the total meaning. I can tell you from my own experience that I thought more about money when I didn't have it than when I did. Look at every hospital wing, church, charity, or humanitarian effort and it will ultimately lead back to a financially blessed person who wanted to pay it forward and become a blessing to others. If you are a good person, we ALL want you to become wealthy!

 2. Time is more valuable than money. Financially successful people understand this and they use their money to buy time while everyone else sells it. When you have enough income, you are able to pay people to do the things you don't want to do yourself. Things like cleaning your house, maintaining your car, mowing your lawn, cleaning your pool or helping run your business. Once I understood that people pay others to do things they don't want to do so they can have more time for the things they want to do, the next logical question that changed my life years ago was; "so why am I getting paid at my job?"

 3. When you sell your time, you are never paid what you are worth, only what the job is worth. My daughter, who worked at a coffee shop, once complained to me that she should be paid more than $9.00 an hour. My daughter is amazing so I quickly agreed, but unfortunately for her the job was only worth $9.00 an hour. Once she understood this, she quickly found a new job that had more value. Remember, salaries are well publicized... Taking a job, then complaining about the pay is like moving to Phoenix and complaining that it's hot.

 4. Happiness doesn't come from having stuff, happiness comes from having options. While a nice house, car, or boat is great, most financially successful people value the freedom they have over anything that they own. When I had a job in my early 20's I was told when to get up, what time to be at work, when to go to lunch, and when I could go home. Come to think of it, most of the decisions that impacted my time and life were made by someone else. You can never be truly free until you are financially free.

 5. Unless you take control of your future, you will spend most of your life working for money. I had a very short debate with a professional in their thirty's last year. After he told me money wasn't his "priority" in life, I asked him; "what was?" He came up with a great list... His family, his faith, his health, helping others, etc... He was surprised when I agreed, then I asked him how much time he spent every day making money?" "Nine to ten hours" was his reply. Ok, how much time does that leave you with your family? Your faith? Your health? Etc.? He got quiet... because it's easy to say that money's not important but your time and actions tell the real story.

Chase your passions, make money, have fun and make a difference!
You've got this!

It's Your Life... Don't Miss It!

Posted: Wednesday, February 26, 2014 by Unknown in Labels: , , , , , , , ,
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From time to time, someone will private message me criticizing me for posting a lifestyle picture or they will accuse me of bragging about my family, a recent purchase, trips, or something like that. It never really bothers me, but today I would like to explain why I post certain things.

Several years ago I went to a wedding for a close friend’s daughter. At the reception, in the middle of the first dance between his daughter and the groom, I noticed my friend starting to tear up. When I asked him if he was ok his reply was “I missed it.” “Missed what?” I asked. “Her whole life” he said. While this friend was financially successful, I wondered at that moment; “How much of his money would he be willing to give back in return for a few more years with his only daughter?” The experience reminded me of the John Lennon quote; "Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.”

From that day on I stopped counting my life in just months, years and decades and decided to focus on having a good day… because, as my friend Kevin Knebl says; “Good days make up a good life.” The first thing I say every morning when I awake is; "Thank you God for another day.” The last thing I do each day is thank Him for my blessings and ask for one more. If the answer is no, I would like to believe that I am ready. That doesn't mean I'm looking to go right away, but if it's my time, I believe I am ready because I have thoroughly enjoyed my life.

Personally, I meet a lot of people that are “preparing” to get ready to live. They delay all the things they want to do on the hopes that one day they can. I used to be like that. I would say things like; “I will be happy once I am married”, or “once I buy a home.” I will be a success once I accomplish “this” or once I am able to do “that.”


So my thought for today is this… Yes, prepare for the future and be responsible but don't forget to live today! Take your kids golfing and enjoy a sunset. Plan a trip, buy a pet, sing out loud to a to a great song, laugh more. Tell more people that you love them and ask for forgiveness from someone you’ve wronged. Don't wait. Do it now, because that is all you are guaranteed.

This is your life… Don’t “Miss It!”

Carry on… ツ

Every Choice You Make.

Posted: by Unknown in Labels: , , , , ,
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Last week, Tracey and I sat down with our third daughter Kasey and discussed her future. We have gone through this exercise with her older sisters and it’s been a milestone in each of their lives. Since there are a lot of uncertainties in life for a teenager, rather than ask them to decide a particular career path or choose their soul mate, we asked them to describe to us the “30,000 foot” view of what they want their life to look like in 10 to 15 years.

Do they want to be married? If so, what would their ideal spouse be like? Will they have a family and what will that look like? Will they own a home? Go to work every day? Will they be making good money in ten years? Will they travel and where? Do they see themselves going to soccer games to watch their kids on weekends and will they go to church? Will they live in the city, the suburbs, or in the country?

Once we have view of where they want to be, I give them an assignment to put it on paper. To cut out a picture of the home they see themselves in, the spouse they see themselves with and the children as well. Get a picture of the places they dream of traveling to and the things they would like to see.

The final step to this process is the most important of the entire exercise.
As a professional speaker, I have taught for years that there is no joy in settling for less than you deserve and that we are all a product of all the choices we make. I see most people give up what they want most for what they want now and I have taught that there is no shortcuts to success.
With that in mind, we explained to my daughter that EVERY decision she makes, from this point forward, will either take her closer to this reality or further away.
Every friend she chooses.
Every boy she dates.
Every class she takes.
Her work ethic.
Her desire for excellence.
Her character.
Her moral compass.
Every rule she keeps or breaks.
Everything!
Each decision will either get her closer to her Dream Life or further away… Period!

This has been a valuable lesson to my children as well as a great reminder for me.
Every choice and decision that I make either gets me closer to my dreams or further away…. And yours do too!

Don't Focus on the Bug Guts!

Posted: by Unknown in Labels: , , , , , ,
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Last week I had a conversation with a good friend which became awkward after fifteen minutes or so. My friend has an amazing family and career and it was like he was trying his hardest to find the problems in his life in spite of his good fortune. It reminded of a speech I did years ago on focus.

One summer I decided to take my family cross-country in our first motorhome. On the third day we drove from Utah into Colorado and came across one of the prettiest valleys we had ever seen. The surrounding mountaintops were covered with snow and had pine trees as far as you could see. The valley was full of color with a dozen different flowers that were in bloom and there was a crystal clear river winding back and forth from the freeway to the base of the mountains.

 As I drove down into this breathtaking valley a bug hit the lower left corner of my windshield followed by a second right beside it. They both left a pretty big marks and along with the normal yellow color they seemed to have mixed in a little green and red. In fact one of them, I recall, looked like it was taking the shape of Florida as it spread across the corner of my windshield.

About that time I heard Tracey scream my name and I looked up just in time to recover from almost driving off the side of the freeway. As I caught my breath I realized that in the midst of one of the most beautiful places in the world I almost lost everything... Why? Because rather than looking at all the amazing things around me I was off staring at the “Bug Guts.”

That story later became a CD as well as a metaphor for our family when we lose sight of our blessing and focus on the problems. When we take our eye off of where we are going and get distracted by the hurts of the past.

So today, ask yourself: "What are the “bug guts” in my life?"
What are you focusing on that could cost you everything? What are you constantly thinking about that you need to put behind you? Then do it!

As I often post here… Life is Beautiful!

Carry on… ツ

Should I stay or should I go?

Posted: Tuesday, November 27, 2012 by Unknown in Labels: , , , , , ,
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Should I stay or should I go?

This is not only a song from one of my favorite 80's bands "The Clash," it's a question that we must ask ourselves on a regular basis.
You will often hear people say; "the only thing constant in life is change." 
While change is a fact of life, it doesn't mean you need to givie up or starting over every time something gets tough. 

As I work with people from all walks of life, one of the most concerning trends I have witnessed is the "disposable" attitude most people have about the most important aspects of their lives.  When things get difficult, people often give up on friends, marriages, careers, businesses, family, etc...  Nothing is safe. 
As I stated in an earlier post, "people quit everything."  I shake my head daily as I watch people sell themselves short or give up on the people around them.

To be clear, sometimes you need to make a change and begin again... but when?
I don't claim to have all the answers, but after working with people over the last 25 years, there is one thing that I am certain of... "Walking away and giving up should be your LAST resort...not your first."

Whenever I get upset at my current circumstances and want to make a change in my life, I always ask myself  two critical questions:
1. Am I in the right place? 
    Is this person, business, or relationship worth my time and effort, or am I wasting my time?
    More often than not, we are the weak link, so here is another way to look at it,
    If I was right would this be right?
2. Have I given it all I have? 
    You have to be honest on this one. Ask yourself this, if I was on my "A" game, would I have different    results than I have now... and have I given it enough time to see the results?
Most people don't quit, they just give up before they ever get good or see the results they want.

If you believe that you are not in the right place and you have given it your all, then maybe it is time for a change... But if you are in the right place and you haven't given your best, then I would stay put and get back to work!  Your "future" self will thank you for it....

That's my "take," what's yours?